April.... flowers bring May.... Showers?
I recently planted my very first in ground garden, with the help of my wonderful upstairs neighbor. I have had raised beds and worked in my family's large garden my whole life, but this is my very first big garden of my "own." It feels amazing!
But beginning this Wednesday, it has...not...stopped...raining.... And all of my tender sprouts are drowning despite the trenches and drains I dug and despite the downward slope of the land. There is nothing I can do now but sit and wait.
Coincidentally, I am also at that crossroads within my own life. I am finally set up with a steady, lovely and enjoyable job and...I am having options thrown at me left and right with decisions that must be made NOW. However, I think I shall treat these as temptations, or as an overwhelming menu at a restaurant. I came here knowing exactly what I was hungry for, but now that you show me more options, I am confused and worried I may choose wrong, or regret not branching out.
How silly of me, I always fall into that trap, who doesn't? And that's a large part of America's problem, right? Too many choices. I could dream up lives I could lead all day long, but in the end, I am already leading my life and even if I switched up everything and went a different route, I would probably still do the same things, just in a different way with a different set of skills and friends. But I don't WANT that. I don NEED that. I can walk the path I am on, because I have already made hundreds of choices to be HERE, NOW. I am happy.
Oh and sometimes there are things we simply don't have the ability to choose, because it isn't up to us. We just have to be patient and wait and KNOW it will be okay, and if it isn't, then we can move to change it. I am trying very hard to be still, to be okay will not running around like crazy to live a big huge life and overwhelm myself with duties and chores. I am so happy to live modestly and slowly pay off my credit card and car loan, because its not as though I am being hunted down by debtors and I am not buying a house anytime soon, where is this invisible pressure coming from?
Family? Society? America?
Whatever the source may be, it is eeking into my life daily, and I want to be rid of it. Like a bad cold, allergies, and extreme exhaustion, it is something I live with daily that make my feet move slower, my head a bit heavier and my heart has to work too hard to pump the new blood into my veins.
We really do not know what is best for other people. We really cannot condemn others when they do not follow the path we desire for them, but that requires so much maturity and strength, and we are usually too tired to have either of those traits.
I suppose, on the whole, as I grow I discover that the less I say or boss or instruct, the better. I desire above all else to be loving, encouraging and pleasant, showing the way with gentleness and light, like the moon!
warmth to you all
Slainte
BRM
But beginning this Wednesday, it has...not...stopped...raining.... And all of my tender sprouts are drowning despite the trenches and drains I dug and despite the downward slope of the land. There is nothing I can do now but sit and wait.
Coincidentally, I am also at that crossroads within my own life. I am finally set up with a steady, lovely and enjoyable job and...I am having options thrown at me left and right with decisions that must be made NOW. However, I think I shall treat these as temptations, or as an overwhelming menu at a restaurant. I came here knowing exactly what I was hungry for, but now that you show me more options, I am confused and worried I may choose wrong, or regret not branching out.
How silly of me, I always fall into that trap, who doesn't? And that's a large part of America's problem, right? Too many choices. I could dream up lives I could lead all day long, but in the end, I am already leading my life and even if I switched up everything and went a different route, I would probably still do the same things, just in a different way with a different set of skills and friends. But I don't WANT that. I don NEED that. I can walk the path I am on, because I have already made hundreds of choices to be HERE, NOW. I am happy.
Oh and sometimes there are things we simply don't have the ability to choose, because it isn't up to us. We just have to be patient and wait and KNOW it will be okay, and if it isn't, then we can move to change it. I am trying very hard to be still, to be okay will not running around like crazy to live a big huge life and overwhelm myself with duties and chores. I am so happy to live modestly and slowly pay off my credit card and car loan, because its not as though I am being hunted down by debtors and I am not buying a house anytime soon, where is this invisible pressure coming from?
Family? Society? America?
Whatever the source may be, it is eeking into my life daily, and I want to be rid of it. Like a bad cold, allergies, and extreme exhaustion, it is something I live with daily that make my feet move slower, my head a bit heavier and my heart has to work too hard to pump the new blood into my veins.
We really do not know what is best for other people. We really cannot condemn others when they do not follow the path we desire for them, but that requires so much maturity and strength, and we are usually too tired to have either of those traits.
I suppose, on the whole, as I grow I discover that the less I say or boss or instruct, the better. I desire above all else to be loving, encouraging and pleasant, showing the way with gentleness and light, like the moon!
warmth to you all
Slainte
BRM
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