Green monster visits!
Ach, here we go, I've got a few hours with no tasks at hand but knitting and relaxing (RARITY!) and I find myself sucked into the portal that is facebook, looking through pictures and I look down to see my fingertips turning a nasty shade a green. The skin under my collar begins to glow and I realize what has happened...ENVY! He's got me again. Twisting me to his will as I whittle away the hours. I should be knitting, or baking or doing lovely things. I tell you, this house-sitting venture is not so good for my moral high-ground.
What do people do who don't have flour or sugar or things with which to bake?! I suppose they watch tv or read, which I can do, it's better than staring at a screen wishing you were someone else. Someone more beautiful, someone with more friends, someone with more money, someone who has seen more of the world or accomplished more by your age.
I would really like to take a sabbatical from facebook, just to purge myself of the excess and the temptation to self-deprecate. BUT wouldn't it be better if I simply didn't rise to the bait? What makes us do these things? Why do we search out these little stings that make us feel inadequate? I don't know and probably never will, but I intend to take charge of my own mind and stay away from the page of the girl I wish I could have been or the woman I will never be. I will limit my time on these social network antagonists and be content with my own grey eyes staring back at me and the long, albeit messy hair on my OWN head.
In this new year, I need to be okay with Rose. Even as I write to you about seeking a further sense of self, I struggle with simply accepting what Rosieness I have already achieved! Ah! To be alive! Time to knit away the green monster...
What do people do who don't have flour or sugar or things with which to bake?! I suppose they watch tv or read, which I can do, it's better than staring at a screen wishing you were someone else. Someone more beautiful, someone with more friends, someone with more money, someone who has seen more of the world or accomplished more by your age.
I would really like to take a sabbatical from facebook, just to purge myself of the excess and the temptation to self-deprecate. BUT wouldn't it be better if I simply didn't rise to the bait? What makes us do these things? Why do we search out these little stings that make us feel inadequate? I don't know and probably never will, but I intend to take charge of my own mind and stay away from the page of the girl I wish I could have been or the woman I will never be. I will limit my time on these social network antagonists and be content with my own grey eyes staring back at me and the long, albeit messy hair on my OWN head.
In this new year, I need to be okay with Rose. Even as I write to you about seeking a further sense of self, I struggle with simply accepting what Rosieness I have already achieved! Ah! To be alive! Time to knit away the green monster...
Comments
Post a Comment